With the days getting longer and the sun rising earlier, now is a great time to evaluate your sleep hygiene. If you’re struggling to get a good nights rest the some of these tips might be for you!

Get up at the same time EVERY morning, regardless of how much sleep you got the night before. Use an alarm clock. A regular wake-up time will help set your biological clock. If you feel you must sleep in on weekends or holidays, allow yourself up to 1 extra hour.

Restrict your time in bed. Only go to bed when you are drowsy. Get up if you are not feeling close to sleep within 20 minutes. Likewise, when you wake up in the morning, get up. Do not lie awake in bed. You want to consolidate and deepen your sleep by sleeping only as much as you need and not spending too much time awake in bed.

You cannot make yourself fall asleep. If you are in bed 20 minutes and you are still not close to falling asleep, get out of bed, go to another room, engage in a quiet activity (read, listen to music or a podcast, watch a soothing TV show, watch or listen to ASMR) until you feel drowsy, and then return to bed. Do not fall asleep on the couch or in your recliner, but rather return to bed when you feel drowsy. You want to make your bed the place or cue for sleep (not the couch or recliner). You may need to repeat this step more than once throughout the night.

Quiet activities and soothing audio can help your body and brain get ready for sleep. You can try a guided meditation on the Calm app or a music streaming app. On Spotify, check out Sleep Cove or Caverncast podcasts for soothing voices. Look up Restful Rambles or ATMOSPHERE for ASMR on tiktok or youtube. You can also find white noise on most platforms or buy a noise machine.

Use the bed only for sleep and sex. Do not read, watch TV, eat, scroll social media, play video games, worry, talk on the phone, or plan your day in bed. You want to establish the bed as a cue for sleep and not as a cue for other activities that are incompatible with sleep.

Establish a pre-sleep ritual. Schedule some "down" time right before bed. This is not the time to check your email or have that heart-to-heart talk with your partner. Those things need to be done earlier. Schedule time early in the evening for working on problems or planning the next day's "to-do" list. Right before bedtime is the time to relax, calm down, and let your body and mind slow down before hitting the bed. Set up a regular routine before bed: brush teeth, put the dog out, lock the doors, set the alarm, etc.

Do not nap during the day. Sleeping during the day disrupts sleep at night. If you must nap, try to keep naps to less than one hour and finish them by 3 p.m.

Exercise regularly: For insomniacs, the best time to exercise is in the late afternoon or early evening, but not within 3 hours of bedtime. Exercise helps deepen sleep and reduce stress.

Food and Fluids: Do not go to bed hungry; however, avoid a heavy meal before bed. Finish eating your evening meal at least 3 hours before bedtime. Do not snack in the middle of the night, or you may encourage nightly awakenings for food. Decreasing liquids close to bedtime will minimize nighttime bathroom trips.

Caffeine has a half-life of 3-7 hours and interferes with everyone's sleep, even those who deny it. Discontinue caffeine 4-6 hours before bedtime. This includes iced tea, colas, Dr. Pepper, Excedrin, chocolate, Sudafed, and all sorts of other things you never suspected. Read the label.

Alcohol or cannabis near bedtime may help you sleep in the first part of the night, but causes multiple awakenings later in the night and shortens sleep overall. Try to avoid alcohol 2 hours before bedtime.

Nicotine is a stimulant, even though smokers claim it helps them relax. If you must smoke, reduce the rate of smoking before bedtime and do not smoke if you wake up in the middle of the night.

Noise: Insomniacs are usually hypervigilant and thus are more sensitive to noise. Consider earplugs or a white noise machine (or even a bathroom exhaust fan) to block out noises

Temperature in the bedroom: 75° is too hot and increases awakenings; 54° is too cold and can cause bad dreams. Insomniacs often report being hotter than good sleepers. Find a bedroom temperature that works for you. Most people prefer 60°- 68°.

​Comfort: Make sure your bed is comfortable, and you have the right amount of light/darkness in the bedroom that works for you.

Clock Watching: You will either sleep or you won't, and watching the clock does not facilitate sleep. In fact, clock watching usually just causes anger or anxiety, neither of which helps with sleep. Try not to look at the clock if you can't sleep.

Exposure to bright light in the morning will help if you have sleep onset insomnia. Sitting in front of a southern exposure window (without sunglasses) for at least 30 minutes every morning should help decrease your time to fall asleep at night. Try this for 5-7 mornings.

Using cell phones and other devices can contribute to insomnia by reducing the production of melatonin (due to the blue light) and increasing mental stimulation. Stop using your phone at least 30 minutes before getting into bed and put it into do-not-disturb mode. Consider using a classic alarm clock rather than your phone to wake up in the morning if the distraction is too tempting.

Natural sleep aids include melatonin, herbal/sleepy time tea, camomile tea, and valerian root. Some use benzodiazepines (benzos) and THC to induce sleep, but those are habit-forming and can create a dependency. Benzos are not meant for daily use, are highly addictive, and should only be used as prescribed.
Prescription meds may be helpful in some cases. Individuals with PTSD can talk to their doctor about trying Trazodone.

Sleep tight and may you find good rest tonight!


Modernized & Adapted by McKayla Robinson from "Instructions for Better Sleep" by Bertelson Washington University Sleep Center, March 2005

McKayla Kagie Robinson, MS, PLMFT is a therapist at Healing Reflections Therapy, currently accepting clients to help you if you are struggling to manage your sleep challenges.

Our day-to-day lives are chaotic and filled with distressing news, world events, and other causes for stress that we have no control over. Meditation practice has long been established as a path towards mental, emotional, and physical healing. The mind-body connection is one that is often neglected.

You may have tried meditation before and decided it is not for you for one of the following reasons:

• “I can’t make my mind quiet/blank.”
• “I can’t sit still for that long/I don’t have the time.”
• “I try, but I just get frustrated that I’m not doing it right/well enough.”

Meditation has a lot of misconceptions tied to it, and a lot of the concerns people have when trying meditation revolve around those misconceptions and set them up for feeling like failures. The goal of meditation does not have to be to reach the point where you can meditate for hours, with no thoughts, and full control over your mind and body to the point where you can levitate off the ground. We’ll save those aspirations for the Monks.


The goal of therapeutic meditation is simply to practice. Practice checking in with your body, emotions, and thoughts. Practice slowing down enough to be able to communicate with your body, recognize your emotions, hear out your thoughts, and spend some time addressing the concerns brought to your attention. We are not looking for a blank slate- we are looking for what we have been ignoring or neglecting.


Another great benefit to practicing meditation is learning how to engage or disengage with your anxious thoughts. The meditation linked below is called a “Leaves on a Stream” meditation. The idea is to practice observing your thoughts, especially the anxious ones, as they come up, acknowledge them, and then let them continue flowing downstream without attaching any judgment or action to them.


I encourage you to try it out! It is less than 10 minutes long and is something you can do from anywhere during your day. Now, it will not be something that you are automatically good at, and it may go differently each time you practice it, depending on your headspace when you start. However, the only objective here is to try. Try it, practice it, and keep practicing it. If you do that, you have succeeded! You will have connected with your mind and body even for just 6 minutes, and that is 6 more minutes of connection that you would otherwise have.


Despite my encouragement, you may not believe that meditation can make a difference, but I dare you to try it and be curious about what effects it can have."

Author: McKayla Kagie Robinson, MS, PLMFT
McKayla is a Therapist at Healing Reflections Therapy. She is currently accepting clients.
​

A common theme that comes up in therapy is people holding the belief that rest is a bad thing and that they are somehow bad if they allow themselves to rest. Relaxation is often seen as a luxury rather than a necessity. Many people equate being busy with being productive, often neglecting the essential need to rest. Whether it developed from messages passed down in their family, their church, the Puritan work ethic, capitalistic influences on productivity and self-worth, or other cultural influences, the impact is the same- Shame. Shame prohibits people from doing what it is in the very nature to do for their own survival. 

Rest is not a bad thing. 

Is this you? Have you shamed yourself for not working enough? Do you prohibit yourself from taking a day off? Do you force your day off of work to perpetually become days of cleaning and project days at home? Where do you think you got that perspective from? Ok, sure, if you spend weeks in bed, that's probably gonna make you feel worse and is likely a sign of depression, but a couple days here or there won't make the world stop.

Winter is a great time to give yourself permission to relax and have some downtime. Plants and tree go dormant in the winter. Bears, squirrels, turtles, and even the worker bee hibernates and rests in winter. After a period of rest, the world bursts back to life in the spring. If we allow ourselves permission to rest, we may 

Still not convinced? Scientific research strongly supports the idea that relaxation is not only beneficial but crucial for overall health and well-being. 

Psychological Perspective: The Mind Needs Downtime

Psychology has long recognized the importance of relaxation in maintaining mental health. Chronic stress and overwork can lead to burnout, anxiety, and depression. Research in cognitive psychology suggests that taking breaks and engaging in restful activities helps improve attention, creativity, and problem-solving abilities.

Popular Harvard psychiatrist Daniel Siegel proposed the Healthy Mind Platter (see diagram below) that outlines the various key areas for a healthy mind and body, which include not only time for work and physical activities and sleep, but also time for relaxation, social connection and play.

One key neuropsychological theory supporting relaxation is the Default Mode Network (DMN), a set of brain regions active when the mind is at rest. The DMN is crucial for self-reflection, memory consolidation, and emotional regulation. When we relax, our brain shifts into this mode, allowing for better cognitive processing and emotional well-being.

Additionally, relaxation plays a critical role in regulating the autonomic nervous system (ANS). The ANS consists of the sympathetic nervous system (responsible for the fight or flight response) and the parasympathetic nervous system (which promotes rest and digestion). Chronic stress keeps the sympathetic nervous system overactive, leading to anxiety, poor sleep, and even depression. Engaging in relaxation techniques such as mindfulness, deep breathing, or even simple leisure activities helps activate the parasympathetic nervous system, restoring balance and reducing stress-related mental health issues.

Medical Perspective: How Relaxation Benefits the Body

The impact of relaxation on physical health is well-documented in medical research. Chronic stress triggers the release of cortisol, the body's primary stress hormone. While cortisol is essential for survival, prolonged elevation can lead to numerous health issues, including:

•  Cardiovascular disease: High stress levels contribute to hypertension, heart disease, and stroke.
• Weakened immune function: Chronic stress suppresses immune responses, making individuals more susceptible to infections.
• Digestive disorders: Stress is linked to conditions such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) and acid reflux.
• Sleep disturbances: High cortisol levels interfere with the body's ability to fall and stay asleep, leading to insomnia.

Medical research has found that relaxation techniques such as meditation, yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, and deep breathing lower blood pressure, improve heart rate variability, reduce inflammation, and boost immune function. Studies in psychoneuroimmunology (the study of how the mind influences the immune system) show that people who engage in regular relaxation activities have stronger immune defenses and better overall health outcomes.

Anthropological Perspective: Rest as a Cultural and Evolutionary Necessity

From an anthropological standpoint, relaxation is not just a modern necessity but an ancient practice essential for survival. Human societies throughout history have recognized the importance of rest and leisure.

Hunter-gatherer societies, for example, structured their lives around periods of intense activity followed by extended rest. Anthropologists have noted that these populations spend significant portions of their day engaged in socializing, storytelling, and leisure activities. Unlike industrialized societies, where work dominates daily life, traditional cultures incorporate relaxation as an integral part of existence.

In many indigenous cultures, rest is tied to communal well-being. Practices such as siestas in Mediterranean societies, tea ceremonies in Japan, and mindfulness in Buddhist traditions highlight the value of structured relaxation. These traditions suggest that relaxation is not merely about physical recovery but also about fostering social bonds and mental clarity.

From an evolutionary perspective, downtime is necessary for learning and adaptation. The brain consolidates experiences, integrates new knowledge, and strengthens neural connections during rest periods. This ability to switch off has likely played a role in human survival by enabling problem-solving, creativity, and resilience in the face of challenges.

Practical Steps to Incorporate Relaxation Into Daily Life

Understanding the necessity of relaxation is the first step; the next is implementing it into daily life. Here are some evidence-based ways to cultivate relaxation:
1. Mindfulness and Meditation -Studies show that mindfulness reduces cortisol levels and enhances emotional regulation.
2. Physical Relaxation Technique -Practices like yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, and deep breathing help reduce stress and promote bodily relaxation.
3. Set Boundaries and say No to things that you do not need to do.
4. Give Yourself Permission- assure yourself you are a good person, doing good things for yourself, and will be able to do more good things for the world when you allow yourself intermittent periods of doing NOTHING.
5. Scheduled Downtime - Setting aside time for non-work-related activities, such as reading, painting, or spending time in nature, improves overall well-being.
6. Social Connection - Engaging in meaningful conversations and social interactions helps reduce stress and fosters a sense of belonging.
7. Quality Sleep - Prioritizing good sleep hygiene (such as limiting screen time before bed and maintaining a regular sleep schedule) allows the brain and body to recover.
8. Nature Exposure - Research shows that spending time in green spaces reduces stress and enhances mental clarity.

Relaxation as a Fundamental Human Need. Relaxation is not a sign of laziness, badness, or inefficiency; it is a scientifically supported necessity for both mental and physical well-being. From a psychological perspective, it enhances cognitive function and emotional resilience. Medically, it lowers stress-related health risks and strengthens the immune system. Anthropologically, relaxation is deeply embedded in human culture and survival. 

By embracing relaxation as a fundamental part of life, individuals can achieve better health, improved productivity, and greater overall happiness. In a world that constantly pushes for more, taking time to slow down is not just beneficial, it is essential. So go ahead, on the next snow or rainy day, listen to your body when it says it wants to stay in bed. Treat yoself! Your body will thank you later.

Author Megan Garza, MA, LMFT
​AI assisted content